A Geisha In A Past Life

Been quite down for a long time. Thought this feeling will leave after a few hours of faked happiness that I kept as a facade when I am with the people I know. Sometimes I wish everyone is a stranger to me. So that they will not have a care in the world whatever I do with the life I know is in fact mine. And I hate chaotic signals! argghh. It makes me chaotic!!!! Ironic.

Have you ever experienced trusting someone then finding out your own blood you suddenly saw on your body came from the stabs he has driven right at your back during the time you do not know when? I did. Traitor. Murderer. Killer. Been a victim for several times now. Think it had made me immortal. Immortal yet not invincible. Doomed. Died. Pained. Dumbstruck martyr in her own pool of blood. Rest in peace.